I'm suffocating
Suffocating from something undetectable
I breathe, it's so dry it burns, gravel in my lungs perpetually weighing me down
don't let the tears in I can't carry concrete with these limbs
I'm trying to reach out to you through the murky water
I'm chasing something unseen trusting you're in front of me
I keep reaching, keep kicking but my bones are tired
I want to let go
feel the sweet relief of sinking
You can only be a sun for so long
you can only burn the clouds away by burning your own light constantly to protect those from the rain and shadows
even the sun needs to hide, to rest
to let the shadows remind us we need the light
There's no regulation here
the dam is a solid wall holding back the calamity that would ensue; patiently protecting
wide open the surge of the raging water
water doesn't need a cause or justification
raging downhill finding the most efficient route
Why does gravity seem so much stronger here, weighing me down
I want to jump
I want to fly again
where's the balance of keeping me grounded and
the wrong side of the magnet shooting me into space
into the stars
to be lost in the blank forever
I long for the days I felt the electricity of dipping toes in the cold sea
the smell of fresh ground coffee welcoming me to the day
your hands in my hair
the way rain refreshes the breath in your lungs
I need that fresh salt air to clean the dirt away
the sun needs to sleep behind the clouds
to be in clear waters beside you.
07/2017 MC
